Truth #1 for YW about dating and marriage

He’s like a silly, faithful puppy

There’s a reason that they often refer to as young people dating as puppy love. It’s cute and innocent and sweet. It’s fun to imagine and think about. Old people reminisce about the days when they were young. Your first crush holds a special place in most people’s memories. Just like a puppy. Puppies are cute and sweet and they just seem like so much fun. We all remember our first puppy. When you play with a puppy, they just can’t seem to get enough of you. They make you happy. You see where I am going with this, don’t you?

The sad fact is that the 18 to 19 year old boy you’re dating is a puppy. He’s not the “man of your dreams”. He’s not close to becoming a man (even if he does have to shave every day). He’s not even useful like a steer, mule, or horse. He can barely afford to pay for his gas and take you places. But on the bright side, he is a bouncing puppy dog. And puppies are cute and fun!

But before you decide that this is the puppy that you want to keep forever, let’s keep a few things in mind. The boy you are dating now is just a puppy. He has the emotional and physical maturity of a puppy. He thinks of little more than eating, playing with toys, sleeping, and licking and kissing girl puppies (c’mon, this is a family friendly blog…). He even bounces around like a puppy when he is around you.

And while he is cute in his own way, let’s not confuse him with Brad Pitt. Just like a puppy is cute because of his oversized paws and big floppy ears, your boyfriend is likely to be a little pimply, a little pencil-neck like. He probably has big oversized paws, too.

Now this puppy really likes you (even when he pretends not to—that’s part of playing that he’s so into). Like the puppy in the window at the pet store that is sure that every passerby is going to stop and take him home, your puppy has the same sort of stupid, ignorant faith in a warm smile.

And like a cuuute little puuupppy (insert image of you cuddling a little pooch), you love him very much and want to see him bounce around and wag his tail ferociously. You notice the more you stroke his head and pay attention to him, he wags his tail even more. Encouraged by this, you want to seal that bond by letting him know that you’ll take good care of him and make him happy. So, you might say something like, “I love you and I’ll wait for you to come back from your mission.”

Now that’s just mean—see Truth #1 for Young Men. He thinks that you’re going to wait for him. He’s a puppy, so he doesn’t know any better. You might figure, “this dumb little puppy is going to grow up one day and figure it out, isn’t he?” Unfortunately, he probably won’t.

Now, you aren’t obligated to wait for him. You can dump him. In many ways, it might be the best thing that you could do for him. First, he ought to be concentrating on what he’s doing (serving a mission hopefully); second, you need to go through at least one or two relationships before you get married. You’re probably his first steady girlfriend, so you’re going to help him go through the process.

Dumping him is good for you, too. We’ll discuss this in detail in later chapters, but you’re going to trade up to something better and you need a little time to refine and prepare, too. The good news for you is that the men you will choose from will have forgotten about being a puppy (and their experience of being dropped off at the pound by a girlfriend). In fact, they are eager to reap a revenge of sorts and marry someone just like you as soon as they can.

So, play with your puppy. Enjoy your puppy now because he won’t always be a cute, weird little fur ball. Don’t make him think you’re going to take him home from the pet store. And look forward to the day when you’ll find something worth keeping.